Getting back in shape: Now with prizes!

This is the most out of shape I've been in my entire life. Most people probably wouldn't think so simply from looking at me, but body image issues are something most women deal with in their lifetime. I don't feel the urge to lose weight, in fact I would prefer to gain some, but I am becoming exceedingly distressed over the loss of the stamina and flexibility I once had. A few nights ago it all hit me at once and I was finally able to articulate my problems to my significant other.

I have never been particularly strong, but before I injured my knee in high school I had a fair amount of stamina and flexibility. The amount of time I spent doing pliés, holding uncomfortably unnatural positions, and simply dancing gave me above average flexibility and the endurance to hold such poses. I used to be able to put my feet behind my head, to perform high kicks, and perform all of the standard ballet positions in full turnout. These days, however, I laugh at myself with a bitter self pity because I can barely get a turnout over ninety degrees. Even a few years ago I had the endurance to dance all night, like the three hours I spent on stage without a break with Takuya Angel at his first North American DJ set, but now I'm lucky to make it through three songs before I'm trembling and hard-put to continue.  I have finally reached the tipping point where I am willing to put in the long hours I will need in order to get myself back in shape.

I don't want to make this a post about society's pressure to conform to the current beauty standards. It is an important issue with many facets, but I do not feel as if I have the voice to articulate it properly at this time. Maybe I will be able to discuss my thoughts on it in the future after I reassess the effects it has on me personally.

The significant other and I have talked a lot about this. We are both out of shape, albeit in different ways. He's strong and very flexible for a man of his size, but all of his muscle is hidden under a rather thick layer of insulation. He doesn't feel the same issues with body image that I do, but he is willing to be my workout companion. We are each going to have to set separate goals because we are aiming for different things, but it is no fun to work out alone. I've also taken the liberty of setting a major prize for each of us, which I will get into a little bit later.

My first goal is to be able to bend over and touch my toes again. I'm hoping to achieve it by my birthday in May. It may or may not be feasible, but it gives me something to work forward to. Afterword I want to train until I can do a front split and after that a side split. My overarching goal is to have abs again. Not fully toned cheese grater abs, but even in middle school I could see the individual muscles when I flexed.

The prizes are kind of silly, but are still something worth working toward. I will be making us Batman and Catwoman costumes, specifically the Long Halloween variations. He is an avid Batman fan and although I have always had a passing interest in comics, it has only grown since we got back together. I'm sitting here watching Batman the Animated Series while writing this post. I will start making mine when I have abs again and his "when the time is right". He doesn't cosplay and has little to no interest in it, but having a batsuit in the closet is something few people would say no to.

Photo by Lewis McBatman on Flickr

On a side note, I know many people who are boycotting DC Comics right now for a variety of reasons. Ableism issues, LGBT issues, women's rights issues... The list goes on. I agree with much of what has been said on that front, but again, that is a discussion for another time. If any of you are unaware of the issues with DC Comics or would simply like more information, feel free to post your questions.

At the moment I am still finalizing my daily routine. It will be a modified version of the warmup routine I used when taking dance lessons. Even after so many years I still remember it like the back of my hand. I even found the song we used: Over the Rainbow by Israel "IZ" Kamakawiwo'ole.

This video is a wonderful tribute to the singer who died in 1997. The celebration on the beach toward the end is footage from his funeral, when his ashes were scattered in the ocean. It For years this version of the song brought tears to my eyes. It was the song that reminded me of who I could have been, while now it is the song of who I am going to be. But I digress.

Like I said, my workout routine is going to be, for the most part, my old warmup routine. I will be adding extra stretches, crunches and jogging. The jogging is a bit iffy right now because winter is upon us and I'd rather not run on icy sidewalks. Hopefully the fitness center at my new apartment will be finished soon so I can use treadmills, but the construction is on going and probably won't be finished until spring.

In the next few days I hope to take some photos to showcase my current state of being. It will help illustrate my goals, but right now it is too dark to do so.

Do any of you have workout goals right now? Care to share?

Lost and Found

So I'm still trying to dig things out after my most recent move. I've found my tripod, but I still have not discovered which box my camera ended up in. Last week I managed to dig out my favorite pieces of jewelry, which had been packed in a jewelry bag separate from my main box of jewelry. New boxes are being dug though and reorganized every day. I've managed to consolidate several boxes, 3 of my ikea storage boxes are currently sitting empty, and 4 dilapidated cardboard boxes have been unpacked and tossed into the recycling pile. And even with that there are still boxes everywhere. But the studio is slowly turing into a place where I can actually work.

I'm trying to fix up the place. The walls in the bedroom are panted a dark periwinkle blue, but have a few spots where the paint has been damaged. They are all prepped to repaint, but I have yet to get off of my butt and actually do it. There are shelves that need to be put up. The cat is getting shelves in the corner, one to use as a step to go to the padded fleece covered one which will serve as her cat bed. On top of that there are three shelves to put up over the desk/dressers so I can stash my DVDs, video games and wig heads. Even the bathroom is evolving into a functional place. My old roommate gave me the idea to buy an over-the-door shoe rack for storage which is now holding hair products, lint rollers, contact lens solution and everything else in a bottle that can be awkward to store. I have a tiny cheap set of plastic drawers which hold most of my makeup, larger beauty products like my collection of false eyelashes are hidden in a larger storage box, my nail polish is stored in several CD storage boxes and all of the first aid related items are crammed into one of those fun dilapidated cardboard boxes which I have way to many of.

Most of my accessories are still in their boxes, but the organization has gotten better. They've now been boxed based on type, hats in one box, bags in another, gloves and legwarmers in yet another, wigs and wig heads in probably the biggest box because wig heads aren't tiny. My footlocker has been reorganized as well, it is currently housing the clubwear which I have trouble working into my daily wardrobe...mostly the things I bought when I first started clubbing and I'm not even sure if I'm keeping. All of my pieces from designers like Renee Masoomian are still hanging in my closet.

I've acquired a few small things from ebay recently, mostly less than $5, but with my lack of camera I can't exactly take photos of them.

• Metallic silver leggings. Slightly small on me so despite how much I love them they aren't as fluidly metallic as they could be. There are slight fractures running through the silver on my thighs, but it is only really visible upon close inspection.
• Wetlook red leggings. I wish they were vinyl, but they don't look half bad and they fit like a dream. I have issues with leggings slipping down my hips or out from under my corset, but these  sit on my natural waist and I don't have that problem.
• Gun print nylons. I've seen a few pictures around the interwebs of these tights, with a machine gun on one leg and a garter with a pistol on the other. As much as I want to love these it is difficult. The biggest issue is that the machine gun is printed at an angle so it wraps around my inner thigh at the top and the garter is placed so low that it is around my knee rather than around my thigh. The other problem is that they are so transparent that you can see my leg hair through them, which sounds like it shouldn't be much of a problem but you can't really see my leg hair against my bare legs so the fact that you can see them through the nylons is deeply confusing. They were only $1 including shipping, so I can't complain too loudly.
• Fingerless black half gloves. I don't have a better way to describe these. They fit perfectly, though since they're vinyl rather than leather they make my hands sweat. Ah well.
• Leather O-ring belt. Bought for a steal at $15. I've wanted one for years and never really got around to it since I didn't feel like dropping $50+ on a belt that is nothing but decorative. Of course this is coming from a person who hoards Takuya Angel clothing. A bit hypocritical isn't it?

Did a little bit of thrift shopping, too. I finally have some casual pants again!

• Black skinny jeans. Slightly smaller than I would like, but workable.
• Black pants with blue pinstripes. Because they're fun and are nicer than my other dressy pants which were all purchased when flared legs were in style.
• Shiny red pants. A little bit shapeless, but I like the material and they're extremely comfortable.
• Pastel blue floral sundress. Because despite the fact that my daily wardrobe is rather monochromatic, I still love sundresses.
• Black v-neck loose knit sweater. A bit short in the hem, but a nice accent piece.
• Cream lace sleeveless blouse. 
• Black sleeveless spandex turtleneck. Heavy matte black spandex, I couldn't say no.
• Black fleece dickey. A nice thing to add under some of my lower cut tops, particularly in the winter.
• Blue chiffon long sleeved blouse. Because I love layering transparent clothing.

Once I find my camera I'm going to start a blog series. I've already started writing the posts, but I want to have photos to go along with them so that they aren't just walls of texts like this one. Once I dig out my camera I'm also going to start doing outfit of the day posts. I'm mad I don't know where it is already because I haven't been able to photo document some of my more interesting outfits recently.

AnimeUSA: Procrastination Edition

This post is extra late, considering AnimeUSA happened in November. Oops.

A friend and I taking a quick break before getting back to work

Sometimes I go to anime conventions, though these days it always tends to be working in some capacity; either as a vendor or as staff. AnimeUSA was no exception. I was on security and did my security thing, only got fully decked out once at the request of a friend, and drank myself blind on Sunday after the convention was over. I don't have many photos and I don't have many stories beyond "sorry, this are is off limits" or "keep moving, you're blocking the hallway", but I do have one.

Throughout the weekend as I was running around like a chicken with my head cut off I kept running into Mix Speaker's Inc. Pretty much every time I turned around, boom, there they were. I think they were magnetized to my corset or something. So of course it stands to reason I ran into them in the single hour I was dressed up like a freakshow.

My eyes look extra dead in this photo, courtesy of my buddy Mark. I haven't gone out much recently and I've been recycling pretty much the same outfit the last few times. So sue me.

The next day I was assigned to wrangle the line at Mix Speakers Inc's fan photo session and guard a door to make sure no one wandered into a staff access hallway all while trying to eat my breakfast/lunch. After their line was finished all the staff in the area were allowed to get photos with them if they so desired, so I decided to grab one.

My phone takes terrible pictures. There were half a dozen attempts, during all of which I was trying to convince them to make silly faces. And yet the only one that turned out was just me smiling instead of goofing off.

Before they left I got a present from Yuki (the smiley one,front left)

My legs continue onto the back of the page...

Apparently I was memorable enough he felt the need to draw a picture. We laughed about this and the length of my legs, so I took off my platforms and stood next to him while he stood on my boots. I was STILL taller than him.

All in all I had a rather fun, if exhausting weekend.

Studio Space

So I now have an actual studio space. The trouble is that it is currently filled with boxes. I'm renting two rooms in a large house (one for living, one for working), but they're pre-furnished and had been used as storage for many years. I'm having difficulties with unpacking because I don't have places to put things, but the owner of the house and I are taking time together to sort through the drawers and closets to decide what should be kept and what is being thrown away.

The room I'm using as a studio belonged to a freelance fashion designer many years ago. The largest wall is decorated with her original designs for companies ranging from London Fog to Dior. A good chunk of the stuff stashed in boxes, drawers and closets in the two rooms is fabric, notions, miscellaneous art supplies and even old sewing machines all of which I'm being allowed to use as I see fit. Not to mention the room has a light table. A full professional light table, not one of those dinky plastic light boxes that could be purchased at my school store. Changing the bulbs is a chore and a half, but it works and it is one of the sturdiest pieces of furniture I have ever seen.

On Sunday (when I have a spare set of hands about) I will be putting up wall-mounted shelves in the bedroom so I have a place to store figurines and DVDs. Somehow I managed to cram all of the books onto two book cases....I don't even know how I managed it. And even more amazingly I've managed to find a home for all of my clothing. I've NEVER had room for all of my clothing. Though, truth be told, I did get rid of about a third of my wardrobe in my last move and another third has found it's way into my fabric bins to be modified or used as scrap.

I've also started putting an effort into my appearance again. Nothing exactly spectacular, but I've been taking the time to get dressed instead of spending entire days in my pajamas like I did for a couple of months there. It helps to actually be able to get at all of my clothing, to have access to a washing machine, and be living in an area where I don't feel afraid to walk down the street by myself.

Because I don't have photos of my studio to share (too many boxes), instead I give you a couple of selcas! And sadly my camera and shiny new tripod are still in one of those boxes, so it is just crappy myspace angle shots from my phone instead.

Before going to the airport to visit family last December. Used the wig to hide my neon hair because I hate dealing with people at the airport on the best of days, let alone around Christmas after a series of flight delays.

I gave myself a haircut about a month ago. My split ends were unbelievably horrific. I still need to get to an actual salon to fix up the hack job in the back, but it doesn't bother me all that much.